The Optimist’s Path

Childhood experiences, environment, success and disappointment can play a role in shaping our attitudes. But whatever your current worldview might be, there is always room for a little more optimism. Especially now, when one dark thing after another appears on the nightly news, flexing the optimist muscle is imperative. This helps life become more meaningful, lifts physical energy and vitality, and certainly makes it nicer for others to be in our presence.

A friend and I were talking about the concept of good health being related to a positive mental attitude. My view was that a positive outlook is a healthier way to live and can even prevent illness. But he countered with something interesting. He said, “Some of the nastiest, most negative thinking people I’ve known have lived to be very old.” Once I thought about this, I had to agree - I’ve seen this too.

Although we’ve all known a difficult, cantankerous person who lived to old age, I still believe keeping a positive focus is important for physical, mental, and spiritual wellness. I like what Dr. Karl Menninger said, a founder of the Menninger Clinic and proponent of blending psychiatry and medicine: “Set up as an ideal the facing of reality as honestly and as cheerfully as possible.”

Why go the opposite route? It’s apparent that many of us choose the path of complaining and misery, but why? About complaining, a wise teacher I once had said, “It’s self-correcting. One eventually sees the futility of one’s own negativity, although this may take many lifetimes.” I found this to be an interesting way to look at it: we are all evolving and one of the roads in our travels is the road of pessimism!

I’d like to think I traveled that road long ago, but things happen and sometimes it just feels really good to get right into the center of the mud pile and complain about everything. If we can be aware of the moment we choose to jump into the mess, and also be a little practiced in how to climb back out and clean off, then once in awhile maybe we can be excused and just indulge. Griping is an indulgence, after all.

Affirmations are one way to help your mind stay focused on the positive and also to help dig yourself out of the mud pile once you’ve had your fun in there. I encourage you to set up your own self-fulfilling prophecies. Listed below are a few you can use to get you on your way.

I make conscious, positive choices
I have the kind of inner fortitude that survives and succeeds through anything
I live in true comfort and joy
I have a healthy vibrant body and mind
I forgive myself for everything
I am open to positive change
I flow easily with change
My own well-being is my top priority
Optimum health is mine now and always
I am fully loved
My body knows how to heal itself
I am completely healthy in every way
Every day I’m feeling happier
I am alive and healed on all levels
I remain in balance, steady, strong, peaceful
I have a lot of options
I have many opportunities
My life is filled with harmony

You can write them out, print and post where you can see them, choose one that resonates with you and put it on your refrigerator, or make a list of your own. Either way, you’re mental focus will be improved and, according to the latest studies on mind-body wellness, you will be healthier and happier.

Healing with the Mind

The mind is so powerful that it alone can help you heal. This requires trust in yourself and your ability to focus your thoughts on what you want and how you want to feel. In each moment you can notice where your mind has gone, whether to worries, fears, judgments, and other negativity, or to thoughts that are more closely aligned with what you want for yourself.

An American named Edgar Cayce (1877-1945) was nicknamed “The Sleeping Prophet” for his ability to enter a sleep-like state and answer the health questions of thousands of people who came to him for answers. Although he died 65 years ago, his teachings are widespread today, with hundreds of books written about him and his work. The Association for Research and Enlightenment in Virginia Beach continues to teach what he brought forth from his trance state.

Although there are thousands of valuable pieces of information collected from his work, there is a theme that runs through his teachings. Cayce placed an emphasis on keeping a balanced mental attitude in order to maintain wellness. In one of his readings he said, “Through diet and exercise the greater portion of all disturbances may be equalized and overcome, IF the right mental attitude is kept.”

Cayce also said, “What we think and what we eat – combined together – make what we are, physically and mentally.” The question then becomes how do we maintain the right mental attitude and turn our minds toward thoughts that heal? Can this become a habit and if so, how?

The first step is to have an ongoing practice of noticing and managing your thoughts. This isn’t easy to do if you’re addicted to the television culture, where mass media sends a never ending stream of negative concepts into your brain. Or, if you like to get online and read the daily headlines followed by stories of horrific occurrences around the world. Or, if you like to “trauma share” with friends and colleagues about the annoying things that happen to you.

In the case of serious physical illness, we might find ourselves in a doctor’s office listening to negative possibilities and statistics that don’t sound promising. Because we are susceptible to these predictions, we often believe the bad news and accept it as fact when it isn’t. This can hinder the ability to heal because the mind is powerful enough to create what it believes.

We hear stories about people on their “deathbeds” whose families don’t tell them what the doctors have said about their dire situation. The person gradually gets well and goes on to live a full life. The mind didn’t have the opportunity to grasp onto the negative concept of doom, and instead believed in wellness. Our inability to really integrate this into mainstream medicine is a huge hindrance to our nation’s overall health and wellbeing. If we were masters over our own minds we could enhance and improve the entire medical system.

There are very few more important things you can do than to shift your mind to the positive. Any negative thought can be transformed by focusing on its opposite. Writing down the opposite thought, even drawing it out, helps change the negative thought pattern. Notice what you think about. Are you hooked in to the latest gory or fear-based story on the nightly news? Do you have people around you who enjoy talking in negative terms, going over and over the same dark topics? Do you do this yourself? If so, noticing these times and making an effort to change them is your path to making a positive mind a habit.

The best conversation I had over the past holidays was with a friend at a dinner party who said, “I’m focusing all of my attention on seeing the best in people. I’m simply not talking negative about things. My challenge is to practice this even when others around me are being negative.” Isn’t that the challenge for us all.

That was one conversation I’ve had lately that could have carried into the wee hours of the morning. When you find another person who’s on board with you, it is inspiring, uplifting, and life-affirming. This is where true healing begins.

Clean Up Toxic Indoor Air

Most commercial cleaning products, cosmetics, and scented items (including perfumes) are sickening. They poison people daily.

These toxins are on floors, walls, countertops, beds, furniture, towels, clothing, and are applied directly to the skin. What happens in your body when they enter your bloodstream? Do they accumulate or combine together to become more potent? Do they cause rashes, allergies, respiratory problems, headaches, liver, kidney, and brain damage while assisting mutant cells in their quest to multiply? In many cases, yes they do. This is why we must think for ourselves when it comes to using these products.

The other day I saw a television commercial showing an attractive woman spraying an “air freshener” around her living room and on her sofa. Later, I saw another advertisement for a so-called air freshener that releases a mist when someone walks by. Since perfume, cosmetics, and scented items are heavily advertised by beautiful people on television and in print, their use seems perfectly normal, however, it is far from desirable.

A well-scented, squeaky-clean home and body is lovely. But to obtain both from harsh chemicals is damaging to humans and animals, not to mention expensive. The majority of products cause toxic indoor air quality that is worse than outdoor air pollution. Commercial air “fresheners” themselves contain volatile organic compounds (VOCs), many of which have been proven to cause cancer. You might as well spray acetone, isobutene, propane, petroleum distillates, toluene, tar, lead, arsenic, radon, and even ozone into your breathing space.

Many years ago I took a day and did a massive review of products in my house. I threw out trash cans full of toxic junk, much of it expensive department store cosmetics and perfumes along with far too many cleaning supplies. I also tossed scented candles and all those lovely smell-good bath and body products.

I began to search for organic, toxin-free replacements. There were virtually none in large department stores, boutiques, drug or grocery stores, which themselves smell of a harsh mix of chemicals from the goods they sell.

I learned to live with very few products. Shopping is simple, I’ve saved thousands of dollars and have taken a toxic load off my body. My number one household cleaning product? A large, inexpensive bottle of white vinegar which I mix with water and use for general cleaning.

As for air fresheners, if you can’t simply open windows and let fresh air inside then use an air purifier. If you want a great scent on yourself or in your house, use 100% pure essential oils that come from plants, trees, or flowers. You can also use an essential oil diffuser or mix a few drops of essential oils into a spray bottle filled with distilled water. Bring in green plants which naturally purify the air.

With the New Year here, it’s the perfect time to address your indoor air quality. How about making 2011 the year you become nontoxic? When you want to know about ingredients in any household product, see the Household Products Database maintained by the National Institutes of Health: www.HouseholdProducts.nlm.nih.gov or get the Material Safety Data Sheet (MSDS) from the manufacturer’s website and look at the list of hazardous ingredients.

Learn more by reading How Everyday Products Make People Sick: Toxins at Home and in the Workplace by Paul D. Blanc. Note that many products labeled “all natural” and “organic” are just as toxic as the conventional ones. To learn more about natural cleaning solutions, including alternatives to bleach, read Organic Housekeeping by Ellen Sandbeck.

A Twist on Your New Year’s Resolution

At this time of year why do we make resolutions to do and be better when we know they typically crash and burn around January 2nd?

Perhaps Edith Lovejoy Price explained our New Year’s quest for a fresh slate when she said, “We will open the book. Its pages are blank. We are going to put words on them ourselves. The book is called Opportunity and its first chapter is New Year's Day.”

As the old year ends, we look to what changes we can make for a better new year. We resolve to begin this change January 1st on a clean slate. But as January gets underway, declarations begin to fade. Whether to exercise more, stop smoking, drink less, eat better, stop buying lattes, save money, recycle, conserve gas, or be more attentive with family, they leave a mild sense of defeat in their wake.

Oprah Winfrey said, “Cheers to a new year and another chance for us to get it right.” This “getting it right” links to a desire to feel good, both about yourself and your life.

So it’s interesting to note that New Year’s resolutions often involve giving up something you like (smoking, alcohol, lattes, shopping) or adding into your life something not wanted (more salads, regular visits to the gym, phone calls to mom every Sunday). No wonder it’s said a “New Year’s resolution goes in one year and out the other.”

After all, we are meant to follow our bliss, find our joy, be creative, live with a sense of purpose. When we don’t, we find ourselves on the psychiatrist’s couch or in the doctor’s office, unfulfilled.

The premise of the typical New Year’s resolution is to do something new that improves life, but in fact, it often is destined for failure because it is in conflict with what you truly want. One way to be more successful is to focus on how you want to feel.

Let’s assume you want to feel energetic, healthy, happy, and safe. You want to feel loved by others while having compassion toward them. Alter your idea that you have to do something significant in order to get there.

Focus more on the “what” rather than the “how.” It’s likely counter to what you’ve been taught. Most of us are taught to go out and make things happen, often when we aren’t clear on what underlies the desire to make them happen in the first place.

Many people are living lives they think they want, yet they are unhappy. They haven’t stopped to ask themselves how they want to feel each day. This is why resolutions get dropped like hot potatoes. They don’t feel good.

If you resolve to lose weight, first determine how you want to feel. Simply wanting to lose weight isn’t enough. Do you want to feel more energy? Do you want to feel more loved and accepted by society? Do you want to feel happy? Are you afraid your health is suffering and you want to feel more secure that your weight is just fine? Get clear on your intention around losing weight then focus on that intention. Make how you want to feel in the coming year the focus of your New Year’s resolution, rather than simply losing weight.

If you want to save money, go to how you want to feel first. What is it about saving money that feels good? A sense of security? Excitement? An inspiring challenge?

If you want to quit smoking, how do you want to feel every day? Peaceful? Calm? More loved?

Determine the underlying feeling you want to experience. Turn this into your resolution. This clarity will help make it happen. It’s not something you can drop that easily because you truly want it. It’s always there, beckoning you.

Preparing for Mercury Retrograde December 10th through 30th

You’ve likely heard someone mention Mercury retrograde.

Wherever you stand on whether the ancient issue of astrology has value, this planetary event has become quite popular in the mainstream. Let’s find out why.

Mercury’s domain is the mind, perception, education, and transportation. When going along as normal, it helps us think and communicate. The retrograde period, which lasts around 21 days and occurs 3-4 times every year, doesn't mean the planet reverses its orbit, but it seems to from our vantage point. Mercury appears to initially slow down, stop, then go backwards.

With awareness, we can see how this apparent retrograde motion affects our lives.

Mercury retrograde is blamed for malfunctioning computers, derailed plans, delays, and confused communications. Invariably, you’ll find people mixing up appointments, arriving late or early, or forgetting things altogether.

Weird things can happen during the retrograde, and Mercury is already known as the “Trickster.” He seems to enjoy watching people slip on his banana peels. For instance, you buy a home but someone else’s name ends up on the title and it takes a year to correct. That happened - to me. It’s best not to sign permanent documents or make large purchases while the Trickster is retrograde.

Another example: it’s pointed out once you’ve flown to your vacation destination that your driver’s license will expire in two days, therefore, the car rental agency cannot give you a car nor can you get through security to get back home. You’ll spend hours of your time talking to the wrong people about getting an extension faxed to the hotel, but it will take inordinate effort to explain why it must be faxed and why you were not responsible enough to renew your license in the first place. That happened, also to me. 

Remember when President Obama had to re-do the oath of office? Mercury was retrograde. And the health bill that needs revising again and again? It was introduced during Mercury retrograde. Astrologers were shaking their heads. It’s ancient wisdom to wait on final agreements until Mercury turns direct.

Ideally, a retrograde period is for review. It’s the perfect time to ponder or research a major purchase or document, or revise something you’ve been working on. The mind wants to rest from its normal push forward and take time to reflect. Otherwise, we can experience frustration, misunderstandings, and confusion.

If in the flow, we would be more introspective and meditative during this time. However, in our modern society, we are generally out of touch with these natural rhythms and most of us will soon be busy with the holiday swirl.

Mercury is slowing down now and will officially be retrograde on December 10. This will last until December 30, right through the holidays. How to handle this period with little or no upset? Take it slow and be more patient than usual. This isn’t a time for doing things at the last minute. Double check travel plans. Allow extra time to get places, to complete projects, and make preparations. Know that everyone needs a mental rest, but is not necessarily getting one, so give people your understanding.

At the same time, be sure what you say is understood. Don’t assume. And, back up your computer files, as things have a way of disappearing in a flash. If possible, take some breaks from the electronic world until we are well into January when the “Trickster” turns back to normal.

Feel free to write and tell me about his antics in your life over these next few weeks. He’s sure to be busy, giggling all the while.